A Different Take on Being Happy at Work

Few weeks ago, I came across a blog post (The 100-100 Divide) written by a fellow blogger Karl Staib which consumed my thoughts for a couple of days.

The subject of the post was on motivation and it was a fascinating read for it opened my eyes to the reality that not every one feels motivated about their lives. To be candid, I never understood how people could not be motivated. Please know that I do not say this with arrogance but rather with a sense of cluelessness.

Because of my past, there was always a fire in my soul that was determined to overcome any obstacles. Lacking in motivation was never a problem. I had problems with a lot of other stuff but never with motivation.

One thing that I love about life is that there are so many different perspectives regardless of the topic. Often, we just surround ourselves with people who share out perception. However, it is always great to learn how other people view certain things in life.

So with this in mind, I contacted Karl and asked him a few questions based on his post. The discussion that resulted was just wonderful. I decided to publish the whole thing because it was really hard to edit this piece. Here is how our conversation went:

HL: As you know, I loved your post “The 100-100 Divide”. One of the many points which you discussed, which I found interesting, was what you wrote about motivation. To start off, how would you define motivation?

Motivation is an internal desire that we try to match through external circumstances. We need the external world (senses) to understand ourselves. I think all of us are highly motivated when we can find the internal connection. I’ve seen the laziest co-worker turn to an amazing gaming (PlayStation) strategist. I’ve never seen such intense focus. This guy was a lazy-butt at work, but put him in front of this game and he dominated.

We make choices that are difficult every day but there is a motivation barrier that many of us can cross and other people can’t. I believe people have trouble finding out how to match their motivation to external conditions because they are afraid. They fear what might happen when they put themselves out there to be judged.

Do you consider motivation to be different than passion or are they the same?

I believe that motivation and passion are basically the same thing, just depends on perspective. Motivation feels more like work and passion feels more like play, but you can’t have one without the other.

Passion can drive motivation, but motivation can also build passion. Someone who has two kids at home is motivated to keep her job, but not passionate about it. This same person is passionate about her children, which drives her to do a good job.

On the other side, a person who stays at a job, hates her whole life, but does it for her kids, then retires and realizes that she was passionate about the job is coming from a different angle. The motivation encouraged the passion.

In the post, you wrote about how in Japan work is a privilege so they handle it differently than we do here in America. In my experience, many people view work as a chore. Why do you think we have that mentality? Do you think that is because half of our population does not love their jobs?

People view work as a chore because of the perceived lack of freedom. They feel that they will be happier somewhere else. I used to believe this. I job hopped in my 20’s because I thought if I could just find a job that made me happy, I would be happy. It was really my own lack on internal communication that made me unhappy. I wasn’t able to find a way to meet my own needs.

A person must first be content with who they are and who they want to be before they can extract joy from work. I think the actual work is secondary to your intrapersonal relationship. Most happy people can be content with almost any type of work. They find a way to see the positive.

I’ve found that spiritual people are good at connecting with their work because they look at the larger picture. They see how the energy that they are putting into the work is making a difference.

Most people are afraid to use their strengths at work and create the job that will make them the happiest. They would rather sit back and wait for happiness to find them instead of making a plan and putting it into action.

If a person loves to design and this person is in the accounting department because her parents wanted her to get a sensible degree, it’s hard to align her needs with the work. This is where passion and motivation must work together. A person must be motivated enough to work on themselves at work, so they can use more of their strengths.

Not everyone can be happy in certain jobs. They can be content, but not happy. Managers must realize this because if a person is doing work that doesn’t engage them then they aren’t going to get the results that they need. When I consult with companies I advocate for them to do career counseling, so they find out what their employee’s needs are. Once a company helps the employees meet her/his own needs at work, the amazing work follows.

In my experience, many employers do not give much consideration to the fact that their employees have lives. We are expected to give our all to the company yet the company does not seem to care much about us.

You wrote that this lack of consideration forces many employees to give just 50% and I have seen that happen in various jobs that I have held. People figure why should they give so much if the boss does not care about them.

One solution which you suggested was that what needs to change is how the employees view their work. With that in mind, what would be your advice to someone who has no idea what they love to do and feels trapped at their job?

The battle with motivation is 100% mental. If a person who hates their present job worked in a concentration camp for one year then came back to their present job I bet they would love life. This internal switch was created by appreciating what was missed and how good they once had it. This will fade again if the person doesn’t keep reminding themselves how blessed they are.

We have to find that internal switch. I believe positive psychology has done a lot of great work in this area. Your readers should pick up the book “Happier” by Tal Ben-Shahar. We need to find ways to be content with where we are so we can find ways to optimize our happiness. A person who is depressed at work must believe there is some sliver of hope.

We need to create that hope ourselves. A simple technique that I like to use is taking five minutes at the end of the workday to appreciate 3 things that happened in our day. They can be small things like a co-worker’s laugh or a good cup of coffee or the ability to solve a problem for a co-worker. By making this a daily habit we can start to build our confidence and create the life that will help us become happier.

Often unhappiness at work will trickle into other areas of someone’s life and contaminate it all. What would be your advice to prevent that from happening?

Focus on the things they can change. I know many people feel stuck at their 9 – 5 job because they feel they don’t have options. We always have options. We can quit. We can switch departments. No one is making us stay at a job. We can take night classes to find work that resonates with our needs.

We need to believe that our choices matter. I’ve talked about stuffing marketing bags by the 1,000’s on my blog. It was difficult. Back pain, boring, and my co-workers made fun of my crappy job. I could wallow in this self-pity or I could use this time to make me a stronger person. I chose to make the bag stuffing a meditation. It became a spiritual journey instead of just work. I tried to be fully present in every moment, feeling each plastic bag, relaxing with my breath, watching what thoughts would arise and where they were coming from. I also imagined the smiling faces of the people who would receive the bag full of little gifts. By doing this I opened up my happiness. I was able to see and feel the beauty in where I was at.

What made you decide to promote the concept of being happy at work?

I struggled with my own happiness at work. I hated every job I had. I now realize that I did this to motivate myself to find my true calling. The problem with this method was that I attacked my own confidence.

By working on my intrapersonal relationship at work, I built up my confidence. I started seeking opportunities to speak in public through my job. I asked to take classes to help me build my skills. I practiced 1 minute meditations to lower my stress level. I wrote in a gratitude journal. I tried to stop complaining for 30 days. Didn’t really work, but gave me perspective. I talked to people who were happy.

I tried so many things that eventually I realized that I could help other people. The best part is it’s a win-win from the employees as well as the companies. Happy people are more successful and resilient. This of course makes companies more successful and resilient.

After reading that 70% of white collar workers are unhappy I knew that I could make the working world a better place. I can’t think of anything that I would be better at and make me happier. It’s all about using strengths and passion together.

Other Articles that Might Inspire You::

• Passion…It’s A Way of Life
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• Project Revealed: Welcome to the Launch of Happy Lotus Lifestyles, LLC
• Forgot About Mission Statements…What’s Your Creed?
• War, Love, The Allure of Travel and “The Lotus Eaters”